Openings: Writing Effective Introductions

By Kyle Cushman, Vermont College of Union Institute and University

Would you buy a box of cereal with just a plain tan box cover and no information about what was inside? Or would you pick the cereal with the picture of the waving wheat field on the front, the morning sun just peeking over the horizon, and the words "100% natural whole grains" in the top right-hand corner? Of course, the second box would more likely inspire your confidence that the cereal inside was worth your hard-earned money. Or what if you bought the second box which advertised healthy cereal and found Lucky Charms inside instead? To say the least, you might feel misled.

Effective introductions in writing function very much like marketing packaging. They need to inspire the reader's interest and confidence in the writing that will follow. They need to grab the reader's attention. And they need to deliver what they promise.

When reading openings, readers want to know,

Readers want to know if an essay, book, or story is worth the investment of their precious time. So the obligation of the writer is to convince the reader in a couple of paragraphs that, "Yes, it is worth your time!"

Thus, effective introductions should:

Introductions can fail when:

  1. A writer starts too far back (We moved to Michigan when I was five) rather than in the most important place (The day my father died changed everything). Donald Hall, in Writing Well, says, "We usually over-explain at the beginning of a paper and begin too far back…in discussing how World War II began, we can begin with the fall of the Roman Empire" (40).
  2. The writer blandly tells the reader what he or she is going to do: "In this paper I will discuss the bombing of Pearl Harbor. First I will…then I will…" Instead, show the reader what the paper will be about: "Many Americans gawked in disbelief as the bombs rained down on the beaches of Pearl Harbor. Had this moment really come to pass?"
  3. The writer indicates the essay will be about one topic, yet actually writes about a different topic. For example the writer may raise a question about the symptoms and treatment for anxiety in the introduction, but then spend the essay exploring how attitudes towards mental illness have changed in the last 50 years.
  4. The writer does not establish authority: "I don't know much about politics, but the trends in the last election were interesting."
  5. The writer never establishes a focus. There's an intriguing quote about deer hunting as the first sentence. The second sentence raises the question of wildlife management. The third sentence explains how the writer worked at the Department of Fish and Game for a few years after college. The last sentence brings up the issue of hunting coyotes.

To help students craft effective introductions, learning support coaches can have them experiment with the following strategies:

  1. Brainstorm answers to the "reader's questions" above.
  2. Do some prewriting or planning such as a freewrite, a mind-map, or a list of ideas. Then identify, from the prewriting, the best place to begin the story.
  3. Experiment with different ways of beginning the introduction such as asking a question, including a relevant quote, sharing an interesting fact or detail, giving a snippet of historical background, providing a compelling statistic, or sharing a short narrative story.
  4. Explain to the reader how they learned about and got interested in this topic.
  5. Brainstorm several opening sentences, perhaps five or ten. Narrow the list to the best three. Then narrow down from the best three to the best opening sentence. (Or, if none of the sentences work, try brainstorming ten more.)
  6. Using the best opening sentence from #5 above, try writing several opening paragraphs (3-5). Choose the best one.
  7. Bring in an example of what they feel is an effective introduction and an example of a poor introduction. Have them explain the differences they see between the two. Or have examples of both effective and poor introductions on hand.
  8. Introductions can be difficult to write for some students. Other students love writing them. The same is true of endings (or conclusions). Pair up a student who is good at introductions but hates endings with a student who is good at endings but hates introductions. Have them swap tips and strategies.

With practice, most students will gain confidence in writing introductions. A well-crafted introduction certainly makes the rest of the essay easier to write because it lays a strong foundation for the writing that follows. But the greatest benefit of learning to write effective introductions is that readers will then be compelled to "buy the writer's box of cereal," to read the piece of writing in its entirety, rather than passing it by in favor of more colorful packaging down the aisle.

Personally, I like writing introductions better than conclusions. Can you tell? Next time, I will share tips on conclusions!

References

Hall, Donald. Writing Well - Fourth Ed. Boston: Little, Brown and Co., 1982.


Questions or comments? Contact the author at kyle.cushman@tui.edu.