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February 2003 Issue

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On the Lighter Side

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Know You've Been In College Too Long If...

bulletYou consider McDonald's "real food."
bulletYou actually like doing laundry at home.
bullet4:00 AM is still early on the weekends.
bulletTwo miles is not too far to walk for a party.
bulletYou wear dirty socks three times in a row and think nothing of it.
bulletYou'd rather clean than study.
bullet"How did it get so late!" comes out of your mouth at least once a night.
bulletMinesweeper is more than a game...it's a way of life.
bulletYou schedule your classes around sleep habits and soaps.
bulletYou know the pizza boy by name.
bulletYou go to sleep when it's light and get up when it's dark.
bulletYou live for getting mail.
bulletLooking out the window is a form of entertainment.
bulletPrank phone calls become funny again.
bulletIt feels weird to take a shower without shoes on.
bulletYou start thinking and sounding like your roommate.
bulletBlacklights and highlighters are the coolest things on earth.
bulletRearranging your room is your favorite pastime.
bulletYou find out milk crates had so many uses.
bulletWal-mart is the coolest store.
bulletThe weekend lasts from Thursday to Sunday.
bulletIf you live in a house with three couches, none of which match.
bulletIf you consider Mac and Cheese a balanced meal.
bulletIf you have ever written a check for 45 cents.
bulletIf you have ever seen two consecutive sunrises without sleeping.
bulletIf your glass set is composed of McDonald's Extra Value Meal Plastic Cups
bulletIf your underwear supply dictates the time between laundry loads.
bulletIf you cannot remember when you last washed your car.
bulletIf you can pack your worldly possessions into the back of a pick-up
bulletIf you have ever had to justify yourself for buying Natural Light.
bulletYou are sitting around making lists about how you know you've been in college too long.

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